I am a weiner...

I mean WINNER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So I was checkin' my e-mails last night and I see this message with the subject - You Won the Sexy, Sassy Grand Prize! At first glance I think to myself: Liar! You're a scam! I freakin' hate scammer e-mails. Then I look to see who it's from and it's from a Ms. Single Mama! And then I think to myself: Wait a minute...did I enter a contest? Shoot I DID enter her giveaway contest! Hooooooooollllllllllllllllllllllyyyyyy mashed potatoes I won something! I won something! I effin' won a mother effin' priiiiiiiiiiiiiiizzzzzzzzzzzzze! I am so awesome!!!

Actually it went more like (in my highest pitched tone imaginable)- What?!?!?!?! She's lyin'. The lady is a freakin' liar! What!?!?!?!?!

And the Bambino is lookin' at me like - What is your deal lady? Get off your toosh and get me my bottle!

And I'm all - Sorry Bambino I can't right now, I have to flip out about this for just a few more seconds and then I'll get your bottle. And when did you get to be so bossy? (Seriously folks, he's really bossy these days).

And he's all like - Do it now woman! Do it now or I will scream and wail and poop my diaper and make the smell of it all invade your nostrils! Give me my baba!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So who's gonna turn down a temper tantrumed infant? Not me. I don't want to have to deal with the consequences of bottle throwing and guilt ridden whimpering. It's too heartbreaking, plus he's a hungry, growing Bambino - the Bambino must be fed.

Anyway, after I took care of his needs I went to go respond to the e-mail the Ms. Single Mama sent me so that I could receive my prize. This morning she sent me a kind e-mail to tell me that the package would be sent today, which means I should receive it within a week or so - it takes a while to get things to the island.

Ok, so why my shock and sheer giddyness? I've never won a prize from a contest. Never. N-E-V-E-R!!!! So winning this is so huge, bigger than freakin' Mt. Everest! Bigger than the booger clogging up my nose right now (excuse me while I go blow my nose).

So I am a winner. I'm THE winner. WINNER! Winnah! Win-nerrrrrrrrrrrr!

Now if only I could've won the lotter when I bought my first and last lottery ticket in January.

Click here to see what I won and here to see my name announced in Ms. Single Mama's most recent post.

I can't wait to sport my sexy apron and read my sassy books!

P.S. I finally got my haircut yesterday. Man, yesterday was a fabulous day!